On Turning 40

I'll be honest.  The thought of turning 40 had me seriously depressed.

It just seems so...OLD.

When my mother was 40, I was 18.  I was in my senior year of high school and getting ready to go off to college.

Me at 40...my kids are 6 and 3.  One is in kindergarten and the other one won't even be in school for another 2.5 years.

When I think about that, I just feel exhausted.  And old.  I don't even want to calculate how old I will be when my little one graduates high school (believe me, I already have but I'm just not ready to put it into print).

And then there are all the things I have to look forward to (and may or may not already be experiencing)...  Slowed down metabolism, aches and pains, wrinkles, forgetfulness, menopause. Peeing my pants when I cough or sneeze. Sagging boobs. Mammograms, colonoscopies and a myriad of other "old person" tests and exams.   High blood pressure and heart disease (which runs in my family). You get the picture.

Deep down, when I'm being completely serious and honest, I'm scared.  Scared of getting old. Scared of getting sick.  Scared of not being there for my kids.  Scared that because I didn't have my boys until later in life, I may not have as much time with them as younger moms will with their kids. Scared that with each passing year, my parents get older too.  Scared of what that means for them and for me.

Getting older is scary.  Getting older is depressing.  And anyone who claims otherwise is full of shit.

But...

The more I thought about it, the more I realized something.

What an absolute GIFT to have been given 40 years on this planet!  40 years of experiences.  40 years of life.  Every year, every hour, every minute of my life is a precious gift.  Every single second I spend with my parents is a gift.  Every single moment with my children.   Life can change in an instant whether you're 14 or 40.  I'm not going to waste time being depressed and worried about what is to come.  I refuse to be defeated by a number!  I am going to enjoy the NOW... enjoy my family, my home, my beautiful children and my friends. I am going to strive to live each day to the fullest and enjoy life.  I am going to thank God for 40 years and pray for 40 more.

I am THANKFUL to be 40.  Not everyone makes it this far, but I have.

So yes, getting older is depressing.  But it is also a gift.  Every morning I wake up to a new day is a gift from God.

So whether you're turning 30, 40, or 80, embrace it! Give thanks for every moment of your life you have been blessed to live. Be thankful for the opportunity to grow old!